Issue #62 - Video

[mistconduct]

[In the mess hall is Chris, who's somehow procured a gigantic poster board stretching a good twelve feet across.

On the board is pinned a photo of everyone on the Barge. Marker in hand, Chris begins going through the photos one by one - every time he gets to someone he knows is changed, he scribbles a black goatee on their face. Yes, even the women. Especially the women.

He pauses when he hits Tig Traeger.

And then takes out a small bottle of White-Out and begins to carefully erase his goatee]






[OOC: A thousand thank-yous to Fire for the amazing art!]

Comments

[darknessb4me]

[Arthas is much quieter than he's been. His new armor doesn't clink together, the chainmail mostly being replaced with kevlar, and there's much less steel in the soles of his boots.

The big black cloak doesn't really lend itself to sneaking, though. He can't believe he's going to talk to D'Amico twice in one month, on purpose, but what the hell is this?

He spends a good 15 seconds trying to determine the pattern.]

...The beards are ones who are on the wrong side?

[mistconduct]

Hey, big guy. Got it in one.

Who'm I missing? I haven't talked to like half the ship yet.

[patheticvillain]

[Cassel discovers this mess when Tig is halfway de-goateed. Looks at Chris. Looks at the board.]

You know, this is. Actually a really good idea.

[mistconduct]

All my ideas are amazing.

[Chris grins a bit over at Cassel, scribbling in a beard over Sylvanas' face]

[megamind]

[ Now free of Riddick, dogs, and with an empty room he an do very little weird, Megamind -- Mastermind -- is left with little he can do beyond sulk and plot. But who can miss this? ]

[ He came up behind the young man, and then clued into what he was doing. ]

Erase my goatee and I will break all of your fingers, boy.

[ If that isn't a clue, then the armored costume, shock gauntlets (that don't work) and worse should be the rest of the pieces. ]

[mistconduct]

[Chris twists around, raising his eyebrows at Megamind.

Slowly, threateningly, with a mad gleam in his eye, he uncaps the White-Out]

Oh, what's this? What's this I've got?

Oh shit. Here it comes...

[Chris pretends like he's about to white-out the goatee on Megamind's picture...

...and then turns right back around and makes a big swipe of white against Megamind's actual in-real-life beard.]

[sickjoke]

[ You know what? Jack'll help. He's real tall, he can reach the top rows. ]

How long till one of our arson-minded friends sets the room on fire? I know our mess hall folks are pretty militant about keeping things here safe, but... man, I feel like we're spread pretty thin.

[mistconduct]

Well, you figure that Riddick is gonna already be in here most of the time, Ben too.

And then I'm just going to take a picture and send it to everyone once this is done.

[theresalwayshope]

...what are you doing? [And by that, specifically, she means the White Out on Tig Trager's photo.

It's not like she actually knows what he's doing, really...and it's a nice picture. Tig actually looks good with a beard.]

[mistconduct]

I'm giving everyone who's from the other Barge the Goatees of Evil. For reference.

Except fucking Tig, who's throwing off my chart-labeling with his actual, in-real-life goatee. Like an asshole.

[dinosize]

That one's of Zane, not of me.

[ He may or may not just be messing with you. ]

[mistconduct]

....



Shut the fuck up.

[ichoosefight]

What the fuck, asshole? What are you, five?

[mistconduct]

Fuck you, Evil Steph. I don't answer to you.

[changeitroundsome]

[Facilier will pause in getting his usual meal to stare at this...thing.]

...Artistic.

[mistconduct]

Isn't it?

It's gorgeous. I have the best ideas.

[heavenlymisandrist]

Excuse me? I'm sorry, I don't mean to bother you, it's just that I think I'm a warden now.

[ And definitely, definitely not your regular beardless version. ]

[mistconduct]

...What, did you graduate or something? I thought you were Iris' inmate.

[voluntaryapnea]

[Well this is delightfully helpful. Who even knew Chris could be so useful? Stiles reminds himself he has to act human here. He has to pretend to be his other self to protect Lydia the best that he can. Which means he'll have to be nice to people he's normally an asshole to.]

Hey, this was a great idea.

[mistconduct]

[Chris grins back, giving a thumbs-up]

Thanks, man. Works for me.

How're you doing? Anyone I'm missing?

[walkingmeltdown]

[Honestly he doesn't even particularly have a good reason to be in here today. He's already had breakfast, he's in too foul a mood to have much of an appetite. He would much rather spend the rest of today locked in his room and trying to ignore how once again everything has managed to go wrong.

But instead he's out quietly circling the common areas, because the overachiever in him would never live it down if one of their new psychotic friends set the barge aflame while he was off feeling sorry for himself.

He comes up behind Chris and stands there silently at first, hands on his hips as he swiftly takes in the chart. When he speaks it's softly and dry.]

So we're going by Star Trek rules for this, I see.

[mistconduct]

[Chris jumps about a mile and a half, twisting around to spot Derek behind him]

Holy shit, man. You're a ninja.

And yeah. Star Trek rules.

...I'm not shaving my goatee.

[crossingyouout]

[Anita knows she's in the wrong place. She's also seen her room, checked a few things on her communicator - she knows it won't be long before she's outed as one of the incorrect people here. But she's uncertain, she's irritated, and she's missing at least part of her powers. So there won't be any roaring rampages across the barge from her.

Still when she struts into the mess hall and stands behind Chris, it's with her head cocked oddly to one side, one hand on a jutting hip. She's wearing the tightest pair of black jeans Needy owned, a pair of hot pink Vans, a heavy layer of lipstick and eyeliner, and her hair is silky smooth and perfect. Her nails are painted and her white button-down shirt is both tied into midriff-exposing tails and with two buttons popped at the top to expose part of a lacy black bra.

When she speaks in habitually in a bit of a soft, husky manner, but an ice queen tone.]

What's with the drawn-on facial hair?

[mistconduct]

[Chris grins over his shoulder at Anita...and his smile slowly tapers off.

Girl, what are you wearing?]

What's with the hooker get-up?

[spam]

[heisrisen]

[Don't mind him. He just slips into the room with a pen when he's done examining everything on this ship's infirmary, and neatly shades his own goatee in.]

[spam]

[mistconduct]

[The fuck even.]

Hey. Hey!

Don't touch the board.

[bodilesswarrior]

[Okay, she's amused despite herself. Thank you, Chris.]

You realise, when Iris comes back and sees this, she'll start wearing a fake beard. [Because of course Iris has some.]

[mistconduct]

Well freaking duh, she will.

Hopefully it'll be a blond one at least.

[myresponsibility]

Someone watched way too much Star Trek. [So did you, Pete.]

I'm, you know. Me. Not gooey and fangy.

What even was that? Does that happen?

[mistconduct]

Star Trek's the best. Shut up.

Yeah, genius, I got that part when you didn't try to eat your communicator.

Does what happen?