Issue #29

[mistconduct]

Sup, Barge assholes. I'm back.

It's been like a whole fucking year, so I'm not going to bore you with the immense amount of crap that went down in my world because oh, hey, come up to the infirmary and take a look. Everyone and their mom already has.

Speaking of moms, I have an issue of rebranding to announce. Red Mist is dead. Henceforce I am no longer Chris D'Amico, but wish instead to be addressed by my super name, The Motherfucker. It's going to be a while before I'm back in the costume but regardless of that, I want you all to call me The Motherfucker. It grows on you.

And speaking of that, informal poll time, fucking yes it's that time again!

On a scale of 1 to 5, Chris' new goatee is;
-Awesome.
-REALLY fucking awesome.
-Sculpted like Michaelangelo's David.
-Way better than Tony Stark's
-I haven't seen it; every time I turn to observe I'm blinded by the awesome.

Comments

[semifreakingnormal]

Do you need to borrow my razor? Is that it?

[mistconduct]

Get bent, Scott. This is sculpted brilliance the likes of which you can only dream.

[semifreakingnormal]

Yeah, okay.

Tony Stark's is way better, though.

[mistconduct]

You blasphemous asshole.

[semifreakingnormal]

That's not blasphemy.

[semifreakingnormal]

...Is it?

[mistconduct]

Yes it is, god. Stop talking. You don't know what you're talking about so stop talking.

[semifreakingnormal]

You're a dick.

[mistconduct]

You're just getting this? God damn you're slow on the uptake, Scott. If you're going to warden, you gotta be more on the ball.

[semifreakingnormal]

I'm on the ball!

[mistconduct]

You're so off, man.

[semifreakingnormal]

Screw you, it's like my second day. I woke up and forgot where I was.

[mistconduct]

Dumbass. Imagine how shitty it must be to be an inmate and have that happen to you.

[semifreakingnormal]

...Okay, point.

[mistconduct]

Duh. Come on, man. No one's going to take a new warden seriously until you put up.

[semifreakingnormal]

What the hell am I supposed to put up?

[mistconduct]

Stop the whining, start the kickassery.

[semifreakingnormal]

Uh, whose ass am I supposed to be kicking, exactly?

[mistconduct]

Pick someone who you think you can take and pick a fight.

[semifreakingnormal]

Why?

[mistconduct]

You want people to take you seriously, don't you?

[semifreakingnormal]

They're not gonna do that if I'm starting fights for no reason!

[mistconduct]

Sheesh. Some warden you are.

[semifreakingnormal]

You might be a little nuts.

[mistconduct]

That's not actually the worst thing I've been accused of, so whatever.