mistconduct | Issue #74

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Issue #74

[Private to Victor Creed]

So...

Do you prefer me calling you Creed or Sabertooth?

[Private to Cassel, Mickey]

Jesus christ I hope you two have it going on better than me. Fuck.

Fuuuuuck.

But hey; congrats. Couldn't have happened to two better dudes.

[Public]

Okay, now I'm starting to get a little nervous. Are we all gonna die, or what? Should we be getting on Iris' bus and getting the fuck out of here?

Raise your hand if you wanna abandon ship.

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Can't help that I was born this flashy. Try not to be too jealous, Fucker.

Oh, you don't mind if I use a nickname, do you? Motherfucker is such a mouthful.

It's Motherfucker, and yes, I do.

Because I fucked your mom.

My mom's dead, asshole.

[Though he says it casually, like he's commenting on the weather.]

[Chris, who probably even knew about it due to comics canon, answers carefully]

So's mine. But that doesn't mean we were close.

So you're allowed to trash-talk dead mothers if they weren't tight with their kids? Just checking. For future reference.

I trashtalk everyone.

Right.

It's still a dumb name. And I hang out with a guy who thinks shouting rock puns in a fight is cool.

Puns are always fucking cool.

I'll introduce you to Alvers, if he ever shows up. Then you'll probably change your opinion.

Avalanche? Sweet. Sign me up.

...okay, seriously. Who the fuck are you? This is starting to freak me out.

I told you, man. I'm psychic.

Still don't believe you. You're probably lying. You look like a liar to me.

That's racist against Italians.

Nope, just racist against your stupid face.

My stupid face is stupidly gorgeous.

You have an interesting definition of gorgeous.

You're so attracted to me right now. Admit it.

What?

Ew, no. You wish, though.

Please. You're totally not my type. It'd be like dating a worse version of me.

Okay, no, wait. That's ew. Please never compare me to you again.

Seriously. I'm way more tan.

What makes you think I want to be tan, hm?

Yeah, you'd probably look pretty fucking weird with a tan and white hair. Never mind.

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