Issue #29

[mistconduct]

Sup, Barge assholes. I'm back.

It's been like a whole fucking year, so I'm not going to bore you with the immense amount of crap that went down in my world because oh, hey, come up to the infirmary and take a look. Everyone and their mom already has.

Speaking of moms, I have an issue of rebranding to announce. Red Mist is dead. Henceforce I am no longer Chris D'Amico, but wish instead to be addressed by my super name, The Motherfucker. It's going to be a while before I'm back in the costume but regardless of that, I want you all to call me The Motherfucker. It grows on you.

And speaking of that, informal poll time, fucking yes it's that time again!

On a scale of 1 to 5, Chris' new goatee is;
-Awesome.
-REALLY fucking awesome.
-Sculpted like Michaelangelo's David.
-Way better than Tony Stark's
-I haven't seen it; every time I turn to observe I'm blinded by the awesome.

Comments

[wemaketheworld]

Could have chosen better identity.

[mistconduct]

People were already calling me the Motherfucker. I just grew to adopt it.

[wemaketheworld]

Isn't other people who choose identity for you. Has to be your own.

[mistconduct]

You've got it easier. You have a whole theme of never compromising and being a reflection back on the world. I'm just some asshole ex-mob kid with dead parents.

[routemistress]

Aye, but you're our arsehole, Chris. Neither of us want a motherfucker in the family.

[mistconduct]

But I add flavor.

[routemistress]

A rainbow of flavours. You can keep the goatee but that name's got to go. Final offer.

[mistconduct]

But I LIKE the name! I've been the Motherfucker for eight months now! I can't change it just because YOU have a problem with it!

[routemistress]

If it were just me I might agree with you there, my love. 'Ave you found a single person 'ere that doesn't think it's gross, stupid or both?

[mistconduct]

Like I give a fuck what the majority thinks.

[routemistress]

Do you give a fuck what the people that love you think?

[mistconduct]

The people I love should care about what makes me happy.

[routemistress]

What does Cassel think?

[mistconduct]

I dunno, he's hiding from me ever since he made James Bond go ratty.

[routemistress]

Someone got to 'im. That leaves a scar. You missed the Alpha drama, didn't you? I 'ad to go in and put Riddick and Guerrero back together, it werw ...unpleasant for all of us.

[wemaketheworld]

[He makes a disgruntled sound and crosses his arms. Really, Chris.]

Earned it. Proved it. Have to decide what are going to stand for, and do it. Everyone's someone else under mask. Mask is something bigger. Doesn't matter who you are underneath it.

[mistconduct]

So I need to figure out a unifying theme?

[wemaketheworld]

And better name.

[mistconduct]

Fuck, if you're that upset about my name, I don't think I want to tell you what the gang following me on Twitter call themselves.

[wemaketheworld]

Going to regret asking, am sure.

[mistconduct]

The, um.


Toxic Mega-Cunts...?

[wemaketheworld]

...Yes. Do regret asking.

[mistconduct]

I bet you never had a fan club.

[wemaketheworld]

Don't bet.

But no. Didn't.

[mistconduct]

Why don't you bet?