mistconduct: ([unmasked] side eyeing)
Chris D'Amico ([personal profile] mistconduct) wrote2014-09-22 09:46 pm

Issue #61

[Standing in Slevin's cabin is Chris, looking around his inmate's room, skeptical and full of doubt.

There's a door there that wasn't there previously.

Giving a suspicious look to it - who's to say Slevin didn't just get maintenance to prank him? - Chris walks over and opens the door.

Well, would you look at that.]


[The camera shuts off. Fifteen minutes later, Chris is standing in the middle of Slevin's bathroom, a boombox at his feet. He points to the camera, then back at himself. The boombox starts blasting out the ultimate 90s, MC Hammer hit single, U Can't Touch This.

In Slevin's bathroom, Chris starts doing the hammer dance. ]


My-my-my-my music keeps me so hard makes me say oh my Lord
Thank you for blessing me with a mind to rhyme and two hype feet
That's good when you know you're down
A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown
And I'm known as such
And this is a beat - uh - you can't touch


[You know that terrible dance move when a person grabs one of their ankles from behind, puts their spare hand to the back of their neck and shuffles around in a wild spasm?

Yeah. Chris is doing that. Except he misjudges the pressure put on his leg, pops the prosthetic out of place, and falls over.]
americasdirtiest: (what the fuck)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-23 12:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I've seen where I was living. I still don't get it.
americasdirtiest: (not really tho)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-23 12:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay, okay. Whatever gets you off, D'Amico.
americasdirtiest: (check again)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-23 11:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, like that's gonna eat at me when I go to sleep tonight.
americasdirtiest: (so dramatic)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-24 02:07 am (UTC)(link)
I'm getting negative wood right now.
americasdirtiest: (you happy now?)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-24 02:09 am (UTC)(link)
That's literally how bad the thought of getting fucked by you is.
americasdirtiest: (I could call her?)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-24 02:17 am (UTC)(link)
Having a fucking preference don't mean I can't still kick your ass all over this boat.
americasdirtiest: (are you together)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-24 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
You know Ian's in the Army. [Sort of.]
americasdirtiest: (not really tho)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest 2014-09-24 02:54 am (UTC)(link)
Un fucking likely.

Did you seriously ask me to make out with you? And you wanna act like I'm the bitch.

(no subject)

[personal profile] americasdirtiest - 2014-09-24 02:59 (UTC) - Expand

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[personal profile] americasdirtiest - 2014-09-24 03:17 (UTC) - Expand