Issue #60

[mistconduct]

[Locked from Cassel]


So say you're planning a trip to meet your boyfriend's family.

And said boyfriend's mom is complete and total psychopath who can fuck with your mind if she touches you.

And you think maybe you should actually try to get along with these complete strangers because maybe, someday in the far, far off future you might actually see yourself getting together with this fucking idiot with stupid hair.


What kind of gift do you bring?

Comments

[mistconduct]

Yeah, but Eddie's daughter probably doesn't have the power to stop you and Eddie from being attracted to each other.

She's not even fucking human! Not the way I hear how she acts.

[megamind]

I hope she doesn't. Do you need a forcefield generator? I can whip you up one so she can't get skin contact.

[mistconduct]

...What's the size of the generator?

[megamind]

Watch-sized. You know me and micronizing! The smaller the package, the more awesome it is!

[ Someone has short man's syndrome and extends it to his gadgets. ]

[mistconduct]

A watch is pretty unobtrusive..

Huh. That might be the best back-up plan we've got.

[megamind]

Bring me the watch I gave you for-- birthday? Graduation? Both? I'll fix it up and upgrade it.

[mistconduct]

Will do, man. Thanks.

I'm not leaving right away, though.

[megamind]

Yes, well, with all this mirror barge crap coming back, having it done sooner is better than waiting, that's for sure.

God, I'm going to have to get on armor making, aren't I?

[mistconduct]

Do the armor stuff first. That makes more sense than this random trip back home.

[megamind]

I'd say I have a lot of time free but i'm currently the only supervisor for the engine room which means I'm basically doing two shifts and dozing through the third.

[ Babara wake uuuuuup, Megamind doens't like being alone here anymore! ]

[mistconduct]

Yeah. So don't worry about this shit, I'm probably not going until a few weeks from now.

[megamind]

Right. Ugh. God we need more engineers on this ship. Can't swing a cat without hitting a superhero but none of them are engineers!

[mistconduct]

Well, goddamn go and teach them, then! Find a science-loving apprentice.

[megamind]

Yeah, that's never really happened. My favorite's taking MBA courses from my inmate.

[ Some gentle bargedad ribbing. ]

[mistconduct]

Wait, who's your-

....Fuck, wow. I am dumb.

[megamind]

[ Megamind just-- sighs, chuckling into his palm so he doesn't guffaw aloud likesome sort of jerk. ]

[mistconduct]

Shut up. It took me a second to remember who your inmate was, that's all.

[megamind]

Sure it was.

[ so much snickering. ]

[mistconduct]

Shut uuuup.

He gives me homework and I hate it.

[Private]

[megamind]

Be good with him, okay? He needs-- contact. And stuff. Right now Jack's babysitting him, but... he could use more friends.

[Private]

[mistconduct]

Of course I'm good with him. You don't need to tell me to be friends with him, we're already buds.

[Private]

[megamind]

Good, good, thank you.

[Private]

[mistconduct]

You're welcome. This homework thing isn't just some charity case, I'm actually learning a lot. Your inmate really knows his shit.

[Private]

[megamind]

Well, you don't wrest Bruce Wayne's company from his aging hands by being a twit, do you? Of course he's smart.

[Private]

[mistconduct]

The freakiest thing? Him and me are goddamn contemporaries. He's just way older because he comes from the future.