Issue #60

[mistconduct]

[Locked from Cassel]


So say you're planning a trip to meet your boyfriend's family.

And said boyfriend's mom is complete and total psychopath who can fuck with your mind if she touches you.

And you think maybe you should actually try to get along with these complete strangers because maybe, someday in the far, far off future you might actually see yourself getting together with this fucking idiot with stupid hair.


What kind of gift do you bring?

Comments

[andyougoleft]

Am I wrong?

[mistconduct]

You're being a real downer.

[andyougoleft]

You are not even remotely paying attention.

[mistconduct]

I am too! It just feels like this conversation is taking three fucking months to happen.

God. Okay, fine. We like being miserable because we like what we're used to.

But that's bullshit. We can change. That's what this place does to you.

[andyougoleft]

I didn't say we can't change. And no, we don't like being miserable - we like what we're used to.

I like being pissed off. You like being obnoxious. Cassel likes being miserable.

It's default. When we're pushed, that's what we revert to. Not good, not bad, just a fact.

[mistconduct]

So you're calling my boyfriend a sulky toddler.

[andyougoleft]

I mean, am I wrong?

[mistconduct]

...No, but I wish you didn't go in for painful accuracy.

[andyougoleft]

I'm a professional assassin. Painful accuracy is all I do, and not just literally.

[mistconduct]

Do they teach you how to target people's feelings in assassin school?

[andyougoleft]

Nah. I was always just really good at that.

[mistconduct]

Clever girl.

[andyougoleft]

We're quoting Jurassic Park now?

[mistconduct]

Can you think of a time not to quote Jurassic Park?

[andyougoleft]

Aaaaaaaaand we're done.

Good luck with your ass kissing.

[mistconduct]

Much obliged, jerkface.