mistconduct | Issue #29

Issue #29

Sup, Barge assholes. I'm back.

It's been like a whole fucking year, so I'm not going to bore you with the immense amount of crap that went down in my world because oh, hey, come up to the infirmary and take a look. Everyone and their mom already has.

Speaking of moms, I have an issue of rebranding to announce. Red Mist is dead. Henceforce I am no longer Chris D'Amico, but wish instead to be addressed by my super name, The Motherfucker. It's going to be a while before I'm back in the costume but regardless of that, I want you all to call me The Motherfucker. It grows on you.

And speaking of that, informal poll time, fucking yes it's that time again!

On a scale of 1 to 5, Chris' new goatee is;
-Awesome.
-REALLY fucking awesome.
-Sculpted like Michaelangelo's David.
-Way better than Tony Stark's
-I haven't seen it; every time I turn to observe I'm blinded by the awesome.

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18th, I know. I was here for that.

Yep. When's yours?

I don't remember.

Bullshit. You remember you're a Scorpio. Seriously, when's your birthday? I'm not gonna make a big deal about it, I just want to know.

Maybe I was lying. I do that from time to time, you may have noticed.

You weren't a baby when all this shit went down, I know you remember.

The 25th.

I'll start sending out the invitations.

The presents better be good.

Anyone who knows me can tell you I give the best presents.

And if I'm still lying?

Then you don't get shit on your actual birthday and October 25th is the day people on the Barge celebrate it from now on.

What a terrifying thought.

Fucking right.

Marking it on my calendar now.

Is there going to be a pinata?

Do you want there to be a pinata?

This is me guessing that actually protesting will be a waste of my time and energy, so I'm just figuring out if I should be scouting out hiding places now or just show up.

In short: I don't care.