Issue #73

[mistconduct]

Yeah, fuck this noise. Why do you guys get to have all the fun around here..


Ahem.


ATTENTION, BITCHES! The following wardens and inmates have been paired;

Chris and Mickey
Cassel and Omar
Sabretooth and fucking no one. He's terrible.



Files appear!

....

Now that is some serious David Blaine street magic shit.

Comments

[patheticvillain]

Oh my god.

[mistconduct]

Yes.

I am your god.


Fucking bow down, for I am the motherfucking bestower of warden inmate pairings now.

[patheticvillain]

Chris, shut the fuck up, no you're not.

[mistconduct]

I'M THE FUCKING ADMIRAL, CASSEL.

Me! I hold the power like fucking He-Man!

[patheticvillain]

Chris, you're not the Admiral, you're drunk or something.

[mistconduct]

You're drunk.

[patheticvillain]

Yeah, I am, actually.

[mistconduct]

For real?

You're getting drunk without me?

[patheticvillain]

Yeah, I'm getting drunk without you, but you're pairing me up without asking me, so we're both assholes.

[mistconduct]

I'm hurt, man. You cut me deep. You piece of shit.

Good booze?

[patheticvillain]

Tastes like paint thinner. Get me something better.

[mistconduct]

...You have magic hands that can turn anything into anything, you fucking layabout.

[patheticvillain]

Yeah, but I'm tired.

[mistconduct]

Well, maybe you shouldn't have jerked off that fifth time today.

[patheticvillain]

What can I say, I'm a slave to the urge.

[mistconduct]

You're gonna go blind by the time you're thirty, man.

[patheticvillain]

So you might as well start bringing me shit now.

[mistconduct]

Not your slave. I'm the motherfucking Admiral.

And I need a kickass hat.

[patheticvillain]

I'll make you a hat if you bring me booze.

[mistconduct]

Deal!

[patheticvillain]

You want your standard three-corner deal?

[mistconduct]

I want my Admiral pimp hat.

I want three corners cubed.

A nine-corner hat.

[patheticvillain]

. . . That's a lot of corners, Chris.

[mistconduct]

I'm worth it.

[patheticvillain]

Okay, I made your stupid hat.