Issue #40

[mistconduct]

Chris' Revised Rules to the Barge

If an Inmate:

-Don't do anything to piss off anyone and you won't get your ass kicked.
-Actually, scratch that. Some people are just psychopaths looking for victims. Bulk up in the gym so you won't get your ass kicked.
-Yes the showers suck. Deal with it.
-Yes, the smell sucks too. Blame Rorschach.
-Holy shit stop whining about how you don't deserve to be here. No one cares.
-Shut up and take your licks like a man. This goes for girls too.
-You should probably get a pet or something. People like you better when you have something furry and adorable that also acts as a conversation-starter.
-At some point, you will crossdress, turn into an animal or a kid, or meet your worst enemy. Multiple times. Possibly at the same time.
-Be careful petting cats. These may also be people.
-Be kind to all animals, in fact. They'll bite your face off.
-Actually so will some of the other inmates. Especially the ones that look like animals.
-Beware of Halloween.
-For real, though, if you need help? Ask.

If a Warden:

-Be awesome all the time.